Ben —  December 5, 2013 — Leave a comment

“I just don’t know what to do, it doesn’t seem like my son is connecting with their small group leader.”

~ Parent

This question I hear so very often, from parents of students in my friends group, from students talking about parents of their friends, and also from the parents of the group of dudes that hang out with me on Sunday.

The truth is that when conversations between leaders and students happen, most of the time they are not profoundly theological or on that level of complete trust. If they ever do get there, it is because we have learned how to connect with each and every individual student.

We’ve learned to do this: Continue Reading…

Hush, little baby

Ben —  December 2, 2013 — 2 Comments

It’s about 1, maybe 2 in the morning and I can’t go to sleep.

Maybe it’s because I have no idea what I’m doing with my life, and I’m just taking things day at a time. Or maybe it is because I am still contemplating whether or not the move 800 miles away from everything I’ve known, was worth it. The change in the scenery, or the fresh start, or whatever. There’s so much on my mind. it just continues to spin and spin, and although my eyes are closed I am very much awake.

Maybe, just maybe I’m awake because of the arguing. There’s so much of it, I can’t handle it but I can’t do anything about it.

It’s f’ing 2 in the morning. I can’t. Continue Reading…

The Bell

Ben —  November 28, 2013 — 1 Comment

This bell has rung over 50,000 times.

Each time this bell rings, it is…

Continue Reading…

You Deserve, Better?

Ben —  November 25, 2013 — Leave a comment

A time in my life that I don’t care to revisit, is the time when I remember how much I hate the way I treated you.

Specifically the time during your marriage.

Prior to me getting married, and while you were married, there as a season of your life when going through what you were going through is not even something I can even imagine. In fact, I am ashamed of my thoughts of judgement when you decided to go down the point of no return. The decision to end your marriage devastated me and all that I believed to be true.

My heart was hard, and I can’t even imagine the pain it caused to know that me, as close as I am, couldn’t even feel like I was by your side through this most devastating season of your life.

I should have loved you more. Continue Reading…


Ben —  November 21, 2013 — Leave a comment

Actions, words, in person or even on social media. We all have the opportunity to present ourselves however we want.

We can pretend.

We can pretend to be an awesome father who spends every spare minute with his son and daughters. We can pretend to be a scholar who has the answers to everything. We can pretend to be a badass who can beat up anybody who gets in his way, to protect his family. We can pretend to be a true romantic, as an example of what it means to be a husband, or we can pretend to be the perfect example of how a Christian should live their life. Continue Reading…