Ben and I decided several months ago that we are ready to add another person to our family through adoption. We set up a timeline and as that timeline gets closer I can’t help but think about this child more and more.
I pray for this child, I smile for this child and I cry for this child. Wherever they are, they are already mine and I am anxiously yet patiently waiting to hold them.
I think about painting their name in wooden letters to hang on the wall. I think about what bed set to purchase for them, what clothes to buy them and what their nickname will be.
And then I am stopped with a pit in my stomach and take a moment to think about this child’s parents. I pray for them. Especially the mother. I pray for her safety, her health and her emotional wellbeing.
Not everyone can understand this feeling. Not everyone is called to adopt. But if you have ever thought that ‘maybe’ you will be open to adopting someday, then it is safe to say that you are not there yet. There are no maybes in this type of decision.
In the past few months I have made of list of promises to our new child. Here they are:
I promise to be unfair if it means protecting your soul or your safety.
I promise to tell you no and not let you get everything you want.
I promise to make you eat healthy foods and drink milk.
I promise to make you clean up after yourself.
I promise to make you respect your elders.
I promise you will not like me at times.
I promise the reason you may not like me at times will be my fault.
I promise to admit when I’m wrong.
I promise to apologize when needed.
I promise to live by example what a relationship with Christ looks like.
I promise to support your every decision.
I promise to hug you, kiss you and tell you how amazing you are.
I promise to treat you like my own, because you are.
I promise to love you.
I cannot finish this post with dry eyes-no matter how hard I try. I do not know this child, but I love this child. This kind of love is nothing compared to how our Father feels about us, but it’s kind of a big deal.