I Lead.

Ben —  February 8, 2016 — Leave a comment

2016-02-07

This past weekend our church had somewhere around 3,000 High School students all together for a weekend retreat called MyLife, however 36 of them decided to skip the Saturday morning session to hike 4.5 miles, to get to know each other, talk about their struggles, about their identity, and about life. Many thanks to my good friend Kyle who captured a conversation with me and one of the guys on our way down – a moment of trust, compassion, and pure vulnerability. I learned so much about this dude, and how he’s handling some pieces of his life it actually made me reconsider some of my recent decisions I’ve made. Go figure. Continue Reading…

Costa Maybe?

Ben —  November 12, 2015

“There just aren’t too many children within the age group you are looking, unless you consider a sibling group and even then you may get one in your preferred age group, but two that are older. Would you consider or be open to looking within a different country?”

This is part of the conversation we had with our social worker on Monday, and it’s no surprise this will be weighing heavily on our minds once we have completed the home study. This information didn’t really come to us as a surprise, but it gave us a more realistic look as to what the sibling group picture looked like. Instead of 2 children, most of the sibling groups consist of 3. The decision to switch countries won’t necessarily cause us to start from scratch but it will definitely set us back a little bit in our timeline, but the decision to add 3 children to our house is just out of our capacity.

I think. Continue Reading…

Psych Eval – Ben

Ben —  September 9, 2015

I started writing this around midnight the day before, but by the end here I will have completed my 2 hour long psychological evaluation which is needed for our home study. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous, but in fact I am terrified. The last psychologist I talked to was back in 2008 as a part of the interview process for a sales position.

This is a little different, but I think I got about the same amount of sleep.

I wonder how much detail I need to give in my “life story,” and if I will even be able to talk through it – especially the rough areas. I guess a little part of me is afraid that I might say something or answer something in the questionnaire giving the psychologist reason to believe I am actually, in fact crazy. More so than my 15 year old thinks when I’m whipping and nae nae-ing in front of a bunch of her friends, or when we bust out in a random dance party at home. Will I have to sit in a chair or do I start right off laying on the couch? What if the chair is just some hard-wooden chair? Man, I hope it’s at least comfy… 2 hours in an uncomfortable chair telling a complete stranger your “life story” or even answering questions does not sound fun. I’d better get some sleep. Continue Reading…

What a rush.

After a few hours of getting to know our social worker and her assistant, and they us (all of us), our first home study is completed.

In the first hour of talking to Kim and Me, we were asked questions normally found in maybe the 2nd or 3rd job interview. These questions were personal enough to allow for some awkward and uneasy answers but we both knew by answering them as honest as possible was our only choice. We needed them to know us, for who we are as parents now and for who we will be to our future son. In all honesty, the questions weren’t really as intrusive as I expected them to be – or maybe we were both really comfortable being transparent. I’ll vote for the latter. Continue Reading…

Ready or Not

Ben —  June 1, 2015 — Leave a comment

It’s crazy to think over a month ago, we were planning on scheduling our first home visit “in just a few days.”

Then came Orange Conference.
and our company released a new product.
and my work schedule doubled.
and then Drive Conference.
and our social worker went on maternity leave.
and our niece came to live with us during the summer.

and…and… Continue Reading…