My children are ages 10, 7 and 2. This was almost the exact age of my older sisters and brother when our biological mother decided to abandon them and never look back.
My mother was born and raised in Michigan. When she was 13 years old when she got pregnant with her first child. A daughter who she was made to give up for adoption. Then at the age of 16 she became pregnant with her second child, married the father and had two more children. From what I have heard she was married to her husband for almost 9 years when they divorced. After the divorce she gained custody of the kids and later decided that she “didn’t want them” and gave them back to their birth father and never looked back.
Luckily for my sisters and brother, their father had married a great woman who took on the role as their mother and loved them all as if they were her own.
A few years later my mother became pregnant with my third sister, Jennifer and moved to California with her. Seven years after Jennifer was born I came along.
So that makes 6 different children with 4 different fathers.
I grew up with Jennifer and I feel like she raised me until she left for college when I was 11 years old. At the age of 11 I raised myself until I got married to an amazing man at the age of 18.
Growing up I always knew that I had 3 older siblings but I never understood why they weren’t around, why they never called and why we never spent Holidays with them. I also knew that I had a hand full of nieces and nephews and carried their family portraits with me in my school binder.
About 18 months ago my second oldest sister, Denise, found me on Facebook. It wasn’t shortly after that my oldest sister, Debbie, and my only brother, Rick, also friended me. After several emails, status stalking and wall postings we decided it would be great to meet. So Debbie and Desiree (my sister in law) decided to take a road trip down South to meet me and my family for the first time. It went well so I decided to drive myself and the kids up to Michigan over Spring break to meet the entire rest of the family.
During the trip we reunited with Debbie and met her kids Megan, Kayla, Paige, Lindsey and Gary, my sister Denise and her kids Katie and Les, my brother Rick and his kids Christian and Jameson. I also have 3 very adorable great-nieces and nephews Devon, Nathan and Bella.
The experience was like nothing I have ever gone through before. There were times I wanted to cry, laugh and just be in the moment that was in front of me. I feel like I was able to do that, except for the crying part. I had so many emotions going through me. I felt grateful, angry, resentful, jealous, happy, bitter and those are to name a few.
While I was there I had the most amazing opportunity to meet my mothers ex-husband. He is the man who’s name I carried my entire life and is the closest I will ever get to an earthly Father. He hugged me like I was his own, was genuinely interested in my life and my children and never said a single bad word about what my mother did.
In fact, he defended her.
All of us as siblings have actually decided to visit my mother at some point in the future and see if we can let the past be the past and let go of the hurt we have towards her. I am constantly working on this area of my life and am anxious to see how God works through this.
I will never be able to understand why my mother left her children or why she kept us from them. All I know is that I love them all and I am so grateful and blessed to have met my family. I am even more excited to have them in our future.